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From Best Friends to More

Since before kindergarten, you’ve been best friends with the boy next door. Both sets of parents have encouraged it and you’ve spent a lot of time together as a result. When school began, you walked the six blocks to and from school, you ate at each other’s home and you spent time together while your parents had barbecue’s and even sat together in Sunday school class. One day after school you came home with a new diamond wedding band. Showing it to your mother with pride, she immediately takes the very expensive ring back to his mother. The next day, you get a stretchable gummy ring and the promise to be your boyfriend forever.

As you began your eight grade summer, kindergarten long forgotten, things began to change. With similar sets of friends and interests, you still spent a lot of time together, but adding friends into the mix caused you both to notice others and form friendships with other people. Always there for one another, no one knew you better. Crying on each other’s shoulders over bad grades, bad relationships and bad decisions, the bond couldn’t have been tighter. Coming home from college, he’s the only person you want to see. You’ve stayed in touch a little and since you’ve graduated, you’re coming home.

This happens quite frequently. Best friends becoming romantically interested in each other. Some of the best marriages result from friendships with best friends. Marriage is a friendship covered with a commitment to love one another no matter what. That’s why the best marriages include friendship first.

While flirting with others and having relationships through the school years is fun and educational, a solid friendship sometimes will wait for that romantic connection…sometimes without even knowing it will happen at all.

Other times, best friends trying to make a “go” of a romantic relationship is not so successful. These attempts can destroy the fresh, easy relationship and actually cause the two to end their friendship as well as the failed relationship. Use caution when attempting this scenario.

Communication is one of the things that sustains a friendship. Honesty is the other. If you can talk open and honestly with him or her as a friend, chances are the romantic relationship will be a success as well. This openness must include emotional, physical, mental and social contours. While it is not necessary to involve the other in every aspect of your life, it is important to make them feel welcome to take part in all aspects of your life. This breeds trust and will actually create some freedoms for you. If there is trust, the occasional “guys night away” won’t be an issue.

While the discovery that there “might be more” can be heady and exciting, there is no replacement for the excitement of “chasing” one another. Maybe you’re the type that likes to play “hard to get” or not, don’t ever rush the courtship to get to the honeymoon. The chance to make wonderful memories, like the innocent ones in kindergarten, won’t last forever…but hopefully your love will.


Comments (One comment)

I am 18 years old girl, My problem is that my genital area is darken and armpit also please some solution for it

imtiyaz / June 14th, 2010, 5:10 pm / #

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