What to Know
You have started a relationship with someone you care deeply for, but how do you approach and open the communication lines regarding sex and both of your views and beliefs on the subject?
You should find a relaxing, quiet retreat, somewhere were you will not be interrupted and have your privacy invaded. This is the right scene in which to open the discussion of sexual and other issues you both are facing in your relationship.
Tell your partner your values and your feelings on this matter, be very assertive and don’t let your own fear discourage you from talking openly with him about this.
When your partner starts to communicate his beliefs and his feelings to you about sex and your relationship, then you should listen carefully and attentively to him. This shows that you really do care about him and his feelings and thoughts.
Ask each other any questions you feel you should know about the other and address any concerns either of you may have, this is especially important when communicating about your future and the sexual asp aspect of your relationship.
Remain understanding no matter what the answers to your questions may be, as long as they are being forthcoming and honest with you about them. You should do the same in answering questions they have asked of you. Honesty about past or the present sexual partnerships is important and can be a life saver in these times. You should each show respect for one another because this isn’t just uncomfortable for you but for them as well and it takes a lot of courage to begin the discussion.
No one has the answer to all of life’s questions, if you both are unsure of an answer, confide in some one you have the utmost respect and confidence in, you must also feel comfortable and relaxed when speaking to them about these very personal issues.
Communicating about sex is a very important discussion you will need to have to be able to move forward in your relationship together and to attain the next level of commitment. It may be a little awkward feeling at first, this is positively normal, but eventually as the conversation gets deeper and more involved you will begin to feel relaxed and comfortable talking to your partner about anything.
The importance for you both to be completely honest with each other about the past and your sexual adventures in relationships previously cannot be stated enough. There are so many diseases out in the world today you can catch from having intercourse with someone, you need to know what contraception was used, if there have ever been any diseases contracted by either of you and how many partners they have ever had if any unprotected sex with. These are all issues that could just save your life and his. Be sensitive to whatever your partner relays to you in the strictest confidence regarding his past sexual experiences, don’t judge him, he is opening up to you and he cares enough about you to be honest with you.
Communicating about sex has to be done in every relationship anyone has, not only does it get your beliefs and values on this subject out in the open it also helps you as a couple become even closer and communication a lot easier between you two.
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